Everyday I have to remind myself that you’re not going anywhere, that I’m not alone in this, and never will be. I don’t want you to go, I can’t do this alone, God gave me you for all my hardships. And you promised me, that you’ll never leave.
I found out about this on monday, and it’s just been mulling around in my brain and it scares me more and more everyday. I’m tired of everyone voicing their opinion about the victim not deserving it, and that these kids deserve to rot in prison, and etc etc. The truth is none of us know what really happened, none of use were there. We don’t know who did what, other than the MSU student had been beat, and showed signs of jumping out of a moving car. The common link in drugs here, some sites say they chose him to rob and get money for drugs, others say he owed them money from drugs, either way it all falls back to one awful horrible thing. It’s scary to get involved in drugs. They consume your life, and completely change you. I saw my brother undergo addiction, and countless rehab facilities, and trips to the hospital, and therapy, and so on. It was awful, it just didn’t seem worth it. I’m so thankful that my brother got passed that rough 6 year span of his life, and lived to tell the tale. Not a lot of families can say the same. My brother has had more friends die from drug overdoses than my the amount of people my parents know that have died for any reason. My brother is lucky that he has a family, and a community that cared enough to help him, and support him. These poor kids did not, so the drugs consumed them and changed them. That’s how everyone can say that they could have never thought that any of these kids could have it in them to do this. They didn’t, but the power their addictions had over them made them capable. I had choir with Sam, granted I never really talked to her, but it’s just so scary that I saw her every day, and passed by her in the hall, yet I never knew that she was caught up in something so dark. It makes me go back and think, if I could have just reached out, or done something. I rode the bus with Tyrel, and I was not his biggest fan, he was arrogant and angry. I knew he had a rough family life, and tried not to interact with him. I didn’t know Brendan, but he’s my younger brothers age, and I can’t even begin to know awful, and messed up and thrown of track this kid must have been because of drug use. I’m tired of seeing countless post after post saying “this poor innocent victim” while this kid did not deserve to lose his life, he had just gotten kicked out of his dorm because of cocaine use. And people say his life was spiraling out of control. So, no I don’t view him as innocent, he was a victim of his drug use, and this is the sad reality of what happens when you abuse drugs. It’s an awful situation, and I hope that people don’t look at saline and see only this. It’s one of the top places to raise a kid, but it has it’s struggles just like all other cities. I’m sorry for ranting, I just didn’t want to go to facebook like everyone else.
I’m so detached and distant and cold at times, but I swear if you spark my interest, I can become so clingy and you’ll become so important to me and I will put so much of my time and effort towards you. But then you’ll get tired of me.